New year’s resolutions
Yeah, I’ve made a few. Nothing really big and only one or two life changing.
I remember back in 1988, I had separated from my first husband and divorce was pending and I was afraid of rushing into something permanent with whoever came along, so my resolution was to not get married that year. Well, it turned out I wouldn’t find someone that I would want to get married to but I did get involved with someone who would have a lifetime impact on me. I got on a motorcycle with the wrong person and he broke my body and now I can predict really bad weather coming. I could also have died in that wreck and that gives me a slightly different perspective on things even now. My resolution that year didn’t change things but what happened to me did change my perspective on life.
A few years ago, I threw one out there that I really felt I needed to do. I was feeling something was missing in my life. And I felt like that something out there was somewhere in my reach if I could find it. My resolution that year was to get in touch with my inner artistic child. And a few months into the year, I got an invitation that would change my life again.
I had attended a gallery opening a couple of years before and been introduced to a lady who friended me on Facebook a little while later. She is a local artist and every once in a while would prod me to go somewhere or do something that sounded like lots of fun but I couldn’t go/do that because I have to work for a living for a company that has little interest in personal development and such like. She had offered a workshop that sounded interesting and a few days before it started, I asked if there were any openings left, I would like to attend. She said it was canceled because not enough people were interested but she was having a get together at her studio and would I like to attend? I said I would and that’s when I met the Roadside Gypsies. My inner artistic child was giddy with the chance to play. Being an introvert, I mostly watched and listened the first night. They thought I was intimidated and might not be back, when someone asked me as I was leaving if I would come again, I answered, yes. Most definitely.
Since then, that group has fed my soul and pushed my art in wonderful ways and I have learned so much. Because of her, I have met a whole nother group of artists that have pulled me to other fulfilling things and places. I attended Art Camp in Manzano, New Mexico three times and plan to go again next July. I have enjoyed getting to know a number of other artists in other mediums and had fun collaborating with them on projects and just knowing them and experiencing things they have been involved in.
But, the local group has stagnated. Due to circumstances, they have stopped meeting. And I am left feeling left behind. It turns out, I need the group energy to really be inspired and do the work. And doing the work is what’s required to be an artist.
My inner artistic child has wandered off again. If I yell, she comes back to visit for a few minutes but I need her to stay a while. I need to make a place she wants to come into and play for more than a few minutes.
Oh, I’ll visit Pinterest and go down dozens of rabbit holes and find all sorts of things that look fun…but I don’t have/make the time to do the work. I have several project that would be fun to do. Things I would like to try. Things I really want to do, big things. And little things. And none of them happen.
And I’m really wanting to make a place where I can call that child back again and say “wanna make mud pies? I got a bucket of water and this spot looks like good dirt. “