That’s just the way I talk

First, a little bit about my linguistic history, I was raised in rural East Texas. If you’re from Texas, you know that different areas of the state sound different. West has more of a nasal drawl, East is more twangy, you can tell someone is from Houston because most of them don’t say the “H” in the name. It comes out “Uston”.
My parents were raised in Arkansas, my dad’s parents were from southwest Arkansas, my maternal Grandma was from Indiana. Each area has it’s own sayings and slang.
Some sayings are self-evident and some have to be explained. Some you’ve heard before and some you may not have.
So, for your amusement…

Slick as snot on a doorknob. Self explanatory. Use your imagination.
Slick as s*** through a goose. Same.
That dog won’t hunt. Meaning what you have planned is not going to work. There was a book by that name on Texas sayings with a foreword by Ann Richards*.
If you’re sitting up with me, I’m better now. If someone was critically ill and might not make it to morning, a lot of the time friends and family would come to the house and sit up with the immediate family of the sick person through the night so they would not be alone if the sick one passed. Sometimes the fever broke and the person got better and everyone could go home and go to sleep. This saying is usually used if everybody is staying up later than usual and one person wants to call it quits and go to bed.
That’ll burn the hair off your tongue. Can refer to spicy hot or temperature hot. I said this to a former Houstonite and she looked at me like I had lost my mind.
My tired hurts. Just what it sounds like.
I’m having a sinking spell. When you feel the energy seeping out swiftly.
Dead to the world. Sleeping so deeply, you are not aware of anything going on.
Whatever floats your boat. Whatever it is that makes you feel happy.
Go on about your rat killing/I’m gonna go back to my rat killing now. I’m going to return to what I was doing before you interrupted me.
That’s not worth writing home about. Information or story that it’s not worth the cost of a stamp to pass on.
If he thinks I’m going to (fill in the blank), he’s got another think coming. Probably not going to happen.
Beat/treat some one like a red-headed stepchild. Treat someone like they’re not worth anything. I don’t know why having red hair makes you worth less.

*Texas’ second woman governor. We’ve only had two. So far, but wait’ll next year.

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